gigglesugar -- Byte-sized comedy.

Grandma Does a Keg Stand!

GiggleSugar — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 15:00:00 -0700

C'mon, you guys! I know it's important to make grandma feel welcome, but can't you just fix her up a burger or pull out some family photos? What's next, tequila body shots? Sheesh.

Cute Alert: Twins Go Crazy After "Goodnight, Moon"

GiggleSugar — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 13:00:00 -0700

This is the kind of response every performer dreams of. And, it's what I do after a particularly good episode of Judge Judy!

Monty Python's John Cleese on "I Could Care Less"

GiggleSugar — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 11:00:00 -0700

One of the most hilarious dudes who ever lived would like to interrupt his regularly scheduled program of being ultra silly and school you on the misused expression (also my pet peeve) "I could care less." For folks who are scratching their heads, and who regularly use this, let's think for a moment. If you could care less, that means that the thing you're trying to say you don't care about, you do care about just a little because there are other things you hypothetically, could care less about. Mmmkay? But I'll let Cleese do it, cuz he's got cool charts and a better delivery.

This Is Your Brain on Stupid

GiggleSugar — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 07:00:00 -0700

There's usually nothing more boring than watching someone else get high. I've watched a lot of Salvia trips online lately, and generally, they're dull or disturbing. The one you're about to see, though, is pretty hilarious, and just confirms to me that doing drugs is stoopid. This guy smokes some Salvia, and then proceeds to talk about seeing "Muppet hair," followed by the brilliant observation that trees are vertical, which he then thanks his parents for. I just hope his neighbor kept him away from those kittens that show up at the end.

Cookie Monster on The Colbert Report

GiggleSugar — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 02:00:00 -0700

Stephen Colbert recently took Sesame Street's awesome Cookie Monster to task for abandoning his whole-hearted pro-cookie agenda. He now eats fruit — and cookies are just a sometime snack. WTF?! Cookie (is that his first name?) tries to explain that he was once the Robert Downey Jr. of cookies, and this is a good change. I'm not sure Stephen bought it.

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Happy Caturday!

GiggleSugar — Sat, 04 Oct 2008 04:01:00 -0700

Remember sneaky, stealthy ninja kitty? This is his brother. He's still learning, though. He doesn't have any game yet.

Military Intelligence Is in Good Paws

GiggleSugar — Sat, 04 Oct 2008 01:00:00 -0700

Who better to teach overseas soldiers about operations security than Squeakers the mouse and his arch-nemesis, the Cat Hacker? This military PSA's got it all: spies, intrigue, high-tech surveillance equipment, an adorable cast, impressive set design. I can't say I'm surprised that the most dangerous spies are of the feline persuasion.

Tyra Banks Is Out of Her Ever-Lovin' Mind

GiggleSugar — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 16:00:00 -0700

The Soup guy didn't even need to make jokes about this recent Tyra Banks taking a bath story. It pretty much makes the commentary on its own. Step away from the crazy, Tyra.

Mommy, Make It Stop!

GiggleSugar — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 15:00:00 -0700

This freaky-ass girl robot created by the Osaka University robotics department is making me rethink my love of robots. She's based on a 5-year-old (yeah, a 5-year-old zombie, maybe!) and could give that Chucky dude from Child's Play a run for his money. Ack! (Also guys, the horror movie music isn't helping your cause.)

Best Commercial Ever

GiggleSugar — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 13:00:00 -0700

It's kinda refreshing to see an ad that focuses not on whittling down what your mama gave you, but rather adding on to it! But I've got a better idea: Instead of buying Viglutes butt-enhancer, how about just being OK with how you look and spending your money instead on nachos? Hey, it works for me.

Best Security Guard Ever

GiggleSugar — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 09:00:00 -0700

But will this furry dude know how to dispense my daily Lotto ticket or lead me to the Funyuns? Doubtful. Cute only gets you so far.

Wanda Sykes on Gay Marriage

GiggleSugar — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 15:00:00 -0700

Wanda Sykes gives her two hilarious cents on why the biggest threat to heterosexual marriage is not gay marriage, but rather . . . divorce. (Ba dum ching!) Her solution? Make marriage like the mafia — once you're in, you're in for life. Sounds like a plan! (The last minute is NSFW, so cover your delicate ears before you get there.)

Little Dog Gets Excited While Eating

GiggleSugar — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 13:00:00 -0700

. . . and manages to levitate his entire lower half into the air. Hey, a primo pile of nachos has the same effect on me.

Stop Everything and Watch a Cat Sew a Scrunchy!

GiggleSugar — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 11:00:00 -0700

Did I get your attention?! Good. I am breaking my rule of "videos longer than 3 minutes only on the weekend." CasaSugar sent this down the transom, and from the moment I laid eyes on cat paws using a sewing machine to sew a scrunchy (or "chou chou"), I was sold. Throw in some dance beats? Positively hooked. I feel like dancing, and crafting and meowing all at the same time. Wheeeee!

Read this Craftzine blog to get the details on this meows-merizing masterpiece!

If All Movies Had Cell Phones...

GiggleSugar — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 10:10:00 -0700

There'd be, like, no challenges for protagonists to face and hence, no dramatic tension! And, most crucially, no Gilligan's Island! (One quibble: Since when was Gilligan's Island a movie? I guess I should give Hollywood another year or so — they've covered everything else!)

Cute Alert: Cat Talks to Laser Pointer

GiggleSugar — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Oh, the cute face! This silly cat with a mustache is having a love affair with the laser pointer. Let's hear the sweet nothings it whispers in a stolen moment . . .

Cute Alert: Dancing Nathaniel From Yo Gabba Gabba

GiggleSugar — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 15:00:00 -0700

I can see the future for little dancing Nathaniel here on the children's show Yo Gabba Gabba. And it's looking very, very punk rock.

Broke Trek Mountain

GiggleSugar — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 13:00:00 -0700

They had a space mission together for five years, going "boldly where no man had gone before." Only, lots of men, even in ancient Greece, had in fact gone there long ago, if you know what I mean. What the hell am I talking about? This awesome Star Trek and Brokeback Mountain mashup, revealing that although Spock seemed asexual, and Captain Kirk was a ladies man, they only had eyes for each other.

Magic Talking Photo Booth

GiggleSugar — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 10:15:00 -0700

Why do some people seem unfazed that a photobooth is talking to them? And telling them to tuck in their boobs, to move to the other side, and to give it a hug? Well, some people have the proper WTF?! response. Check it out . . .

Ruh Roh!

GiggleSugar — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Way to support the arts, reporter dude! That young artiste looks like she's in shock, but I'd run if I were you. She might be ready to strike, especially if you keep laughing.

Bwahahahaha!

GiggleSugar — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 08:00:00 -0700

If you ever wondered what Van Halen's Runnin' With the Devil sounds like without music — just David Lee Roth's shouts, screams, shrieks, exclamations, grunts, and whistles — here's your chance! How thoughtful of him to leave many uncomfortable silences in between for you to laugh your ever-lovin' ass off! Why is this funny? I couldn't tell you. It just is.

Douchebag Beach: What's Your Favorite Quote?

GiggleSugar — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 07:00:00 -0700

It's baa-aack! We had this up a couple months ago, and just as people were falling in love with the adorable characters of Douchebag Beach, it was yanked from YouTube. Well, thanks to the work of diligent researchers here at the GiggleSugar lab 'o' laughs, we bring it to you again. For those who enjoyed it the first time, maybe a second viewing will be even better, and for those who never saw it at all — brace yourselves. Basically, some intrepid anthropologist/sociologist/comedian went to the Jersey Shore and interviewed folks you couldn't make up if you tried. After you watch it, tell me . . . what's your favorite quote?

Douchebag Beach: What's Your Favorite Quote?

"I like guidos and muscles — not too much of a meathead."

"We live in Jersey, which is one of the best states in New Jersey."

"I was like [dancing with] one leg at the club . . ."

"I love gettin' up on bars, or chairs or . . . above. Anywhere dancing."

"I was a brunette guy for a while, then I switched to blondes. And then I realized they're all the same."

"I'm gonna try to breed a kid my size . . ."

"I met him on the beach today . . . but you know, you don't have too much to grab. I like the cameraman . . ."

"Biggest pet peeve? I don't even know what the f*ck that means!"

Other (see comments below)

Cute Alert: Porcine Einstein

GiggleSugar — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 14:00:00 -0700

If anyone gets me off my bacon habit, it's going to be this ridiculously cute and smart pig, Mudslinger. I love him almost as much as Arnold Ziffle, the little stamp-collecting pig from one of the best shows ever made, Green Acres. (On a side note, Mackenzie Phillips and Lori Petty on the same show? Wow.)

Student Faints, Politician Keeps Talking

GiggleSugar — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 11:00:00 -0700

I love how nonchalant the Prime Minister of Canada, Stephen Harper, is about someone fainting and falling to the floor during his speech. He just glances over, takes a sip of water, and keeps talking. Oh, the compassion!

Keep This Reporter Away From Your Sand Castles

GiggleSugar — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 09:00:00 -0700

This surfer dude built an amazing sand castle, only to have this reporter deftly ruin a portion of it by smooshing it on live TV. He's so chill, he doesn't even blink an eye. I guess if you live your life in Speedos building sand castles, you get to be pretty unfazeable.

Izzy Gets His Opera On

GiggleSugar — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 16:00:00 -0700

Izzy the dog was just lying around one day when suddenly, German opera on television moved him to join in. You will laugh your ass off, but your ears may never forgive you. (It's practically dog day here at GiggleSugar. Imagine that! Don't worry, cats, I still love you!)

Dubious Talent of the Day

GiggleSugar — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 15:00:00 -0700

You might wanna keep this one to yourselves, ladies. I'm just sayin'. . .

Don't Pass Out Around This Little Dog . . .

GiggleSugar — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Especially if you're a drunk dude. He's what you call an opportunistic smoocher. If this doesn't get the guy off hooch when he wakes from his ~~slumber~~ blackout, I don't know what will.

Doggie's Got Some Issues We All Can Relate To

GiggleSugar — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:00:00 -0700

You know how sometimes the only barrier that keeps us from what we want is in our minds? Well, Isabelle the doggie illustrates that perfectly here. Her human companions have removed the screen from the screen door, but because Isabelle is used to going out only when it's opened, she won't budge. They stick their hands through it to show her, but —nope, you gotta open it. GiggleSugar's philosophy lesson du jour: it's all in your head, yo!

One-Man AC/DC Cover Band

GiggleSugar — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 10:00:00 -0700

If you want something done right — do it yourself. Who knew that could include performing in an AC/DC cover band of one? This guy ~~sings~~ shrieks, plays the keyboard, and drums his heart out — all by himself. Awesome.

The Best Song You'll Hear All Day

GiggleSugar — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 07:00:00 -0700

He likes dogs cuz dogs are cool. (How could you argue with that?) I'm digging the minimalism and sentiment of this amazing music video. But even better? I'm really loving the long, black mullet wig. 'Tis a sublime thing of beauty that makes me weep.

Spaz Alert!

GiggleSugar — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 04:00:00 -0700

What the hell kind of dancing is this? It's like a bunch of mimes smoked some crack cocaine and decided to stage a Broadway show. Seriously, man. Watching that one dude walk backward on his head (just watch — I can't describe it) while that blonde woman did the chicken dance at hyper-speed gave me a contact high. (Pay special attention to 1:06, 1:48 and 2:03. But if you know what's good for you, you'll watch the whole damn thing. Trust me.) This is Paradise, all right!

Hammie Time!

GiggleSugar — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 02:00:00 -0700

I guess hammie wants ~~a cracker~~ all the crackers!

Happy Caturday!

GiggleSugar — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 04:01:00 -0700

Just because it's Fall doesn't mean you get to eat all you want and stop exercising. Heck, even cats are exercising on Caturday!

Cute Alert: Baby Hedgehog Eating a Carrot

GiggleSugar — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 01:00:00 -0700

OMG. This little guy is really going to town on that carrot! He's like a cartoon. The quills on his tiny forehead are moving around, and it looks like he's smiling. Good lord he's cute. But one question: where the heck do people get hedgehog pets?!

The Devil Walks Prada

GiggleSugar — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 16:17:16 -0700

Well, Agatha Ruiz de la Prada. Sacha Baron Cohen is up to some new tricks. Instead of just punking Spring Break yahoos in Miami, he's going after Milan Fashion Week designers! Somehow, he got backstage access to the other Prada show in Milan and walked the runway until startled (and I imagine, pissed off) fashionistas gave him a well-heeled boot. All this for his upcoming movie Bruno: Delicious Journeys Through America For the Purpose of Making Heterosexual Male. And honestly — I can't wait! Go Bruno! (To read more about his antics at Milan's Fashion Week, click here.)

TGIF!

GiggleSugar — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 16:00:00 -0700

Some people have an inner child. I have an inner trampoline jumpin' guy. This video demonstrates what my inner trampoline jumpin' guy is doing right now in celebration of Friday. Wheeee!

An Ode to Milk and Cereal

GiggleSugar — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 15:00:00 -0700

It's the simple things in life that give you pleasure. The smile on a child's face. The first dew of Spring. Jalepenos on a piping hot pile of movie-theater nachos. That's why I love this song by two goofballs about how much they love milk and cereal. (It's supposed to be a classic, but somehow it went under my radar. This is the first time I've seen it!)

Madonna's Fans Don't Know Her Lyrics!

GiggleSugar — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 11:00:00 -0700

Poor Madonna. I know some of her hugest fans, but apparently they didn't show up to this concert. It appears something is wrong with her mic, and then, when she tries to get them to engage in the ol' "finish my singing for me so you, too, can feel a part of this concert," they go blank. What self-respecting Madonna fan doesn't know the lyrics to "Dress You Up in My Love"?! But they can sing "oo-ah oo-ah!" Naturally.

Too Lazy to Exercise? Pretend Bats Are Chasing You!

GiggleSugar — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 09:00:00 -0700

Hey, it makes more sense than the all-cabbage diet, starving yourself, or zombie aerobics!

Flaming Shots: Some People Will Never Learn

GiggleSugar — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 07:00:00 -0700

People, is the prospect of getting sh*t-faced not enough for you? It's all fun and games until your face is burned off and your parents' home is burned to the ground. Good times.

Coffee, Tea, or . . . WTF?!

GiggleSugar — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 15:00:00 -0700

You can't even get a meal on domestic flights these days, but apparently, the now-defunct Braniff ~~offered~~ practically promised stripping flight attendants. Ah, those were the days! (I guess Hooters Airlines realized it had a niche to fill.)

Flashback: Wonder Woman vs. a Gorilla

GiggleSugar — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 13:00:00 -0700

Laugh if you will at Wonder Woman's hottie superhero Lynda Carter fighting a gorilla, but it's still more interesting than the dialogue in The Hills.

The Underminer: We All Know One!

GiggleSugar — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 12:00:00 -0700

We all know an Underminer. These folks pass off insults as compliments, condescension as concern, and disses as advice. This Underminer, however, has gone too, too far. He has insulted little Checkers, to which I say, a dog with hair this good is untouchable. Step away from Checkers. Or I may have to hurt you.

Flashback: Ricardo Montalban in Chrysler Cordoba Ad

GiggleSugar — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 10:17:30 -0700

I could listen to Ricardo "Mr. Roarke" Montalban say "soft Corr-in-thian leather" over and over again in an endless loop. It's even better when you learn that there's no such thing as Corinthian leather. The leather in Chrysler's Cordoba was from New Jersey. (New Jersey?! Get a rope.)

Thanks, Neatorama!

Cute Alert: Little Dog Herds a Horse!

GiggleSugar — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 08:00:00 -0700

This little doggie, who seems to go by the name "Cheeps," is clearly the boss of this horse. I kept thinking he was gonna get stepped on, but with his assertiveness and leadership, he got the job done! Good boy, Cheeps!

Dumbass of the Day

GiggleSugar — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 04:00:00 -0700

A Russian dude recently tried to rob a kiosk, only to get stuck in the window and have to get pried out by the cops! Whoops. Then, just to save face, he gave them some attitude. What a tough guy!

Video Prozac

GiggleSugar — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 15:30:00 -0700

This video just put me in a 100% better mood. It's not just the Abba-esque accents and tunes. Or even the '50s cheerleader apparel. Or even the bizarre dancing. It's everything together, like the colors of the rainbow shining over smiling unicorns and puppies. Happy, happy, joy, joy!

Nice Try, Airborne!

GiggleSugar — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 11:00:00 -0700

Now that Airborne has been largely discredited as a cold preventer, they've decided to go to fantasy land in their ads. Sorry, Sebastian, you've got a nice bod, but I will stick to washing my hands a lot, thank you very much. (While we're on the subject of romance novels, check out this poll. . .)

Coco's Cat Rap!

GiggleSugar — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 10:00:00 -0700

As if this Nelly song wasn't catchy enough to be lodged in your head forever — add a cat rapping and singing. I wish that dude let Coco rap more. I was just waiting out his performance until she came on. (Have I heard this before, or does it just seem totally normal for a cat to sing?)